I've ended it with my girlfriend

Just for now, consider it as some sort of break to sort out feelings. If there are any.

I've got mixed feelings about it really, I don't know whether to be happy or not. But for the time being I think I just need to sort out my thoughts.


P.S. I forgot how much of a pain it is to type with my iPod. It gets annoying after a while.

Something random

You know, New Year has always been something that I hate. I hate that it's new year because it means your a year closer to something you know is going to happen.

2009, so far (the year is not over yet) has changed me. I've changed in so much this year that when I look back I can't believe I was the that kind of person last January. I have changed. And I hope it's for the better.

I just this New Year brings another lot of changes. And I hope to do well in all that I try. I hope life isn't going to be complicated like this year has been.

Just something random I felt I needed to share.

Girlfriends.

I know, highschool girl drama, right?

But this one is my drama. And being in a lesbian relationship doesn't help it either, right?

I'm confused on whether I still have those feelings I had for my girlfriend that I did when we first started going out. I'm not happy in my relationship anymore. And I'm not sure whether I want to be with her anymore or not. I'm not sure whether I still want to be with her or not. She keeps pushing me for sex, but I'm not sure whether I want to go that far with her or not. I'm not sure about much anymore. I don't want to piss her off by ending it, though she's promised to stay my friend even if we do end it, as I have the same. I'm just not sure anymore.

I'm just having some relationship problems, is all. I'm just not sure if I'm ready for a relationship anymore that's all.

Merry Christmas!

Just thought I'd say it...

I saw Lucas a Walker Texas Ranger episode today

And boy was it sad. I was crying through most of the two episodes. The main reason that I watched it was because my favourite actor Haley Joel Osment was in it, and I read the summary and thought it sounded pretty decent. But never have I cried so much for something like that in my entire life.

But yeah, that's mainly what I've done today, I've almost finished reading the book thief, which has been amazing so far. I have maybe a hundred or so pages left.

Good day today though, besides all the snow were not supposed to be getting, it's been snowing for the past four days or so now, and I have washing to do, and I can't to it if it's snowing.

Any way,
Merry Christmas Adam!

That's a familly thing, in case anyones wondering.....

It's three thirty in the morning

And I can't seem to be able to sleep, I'm trying to ware myself out but it isn't seeming to work.

It's just soooooo hot in my room at the moment. I think thats what it is....

University

University has been playing on my mind recently. I've been thinking about it a lot since my brother has been getting his conditional offers. Of course, I'd thought about which ones I'd like to go to before. Like my friend is determined to get to Swansea Uni, whereas I really want to go to Birmingham Uni.

The cost of university I think is what's going to hold me back. Its what £4000 a year in uni, then you have living cost on top of that. Life's just difficult like that. But I'm sure there will be enough support to get me through. I'm definitely getting a job. It's a lot easier that way hopefully.

The course I want to study is Joint Honours English and Creative writing. The course seems fitting considering I want to be a writer when I grow up, right?

Yesterday, I had a lot to talk about when it came to writing about uni, but I left it till today, and now all the ideas just seem to have drained out of me. Next time I'll have to write notes right?

One thing I can guarantee you though, I think uni is going to be amazing, even though I have a year and a half left in school.

Oh well, it's not long until I'm free.

I'll probably have a different opinion when the day comes, right?? :D

Rhiannon

I figured my first topic to start off should be someone I hope I know quite well. Her name is Rhiannon, she is currently 17 years old. And is horrible to me. We are currently friends, but she's still horrible to me and everyone around me. I don't think she personally notices it, but everyone else around her seems to. She constantly smells and has bad breath (she doesn't brush her teeth) and whilst typing this I wonder why I ever became friends with her anyway.

There's really not much to say in which she has been horrible to me, you know it's always the same kind of thing...she makes out that I'm less intelligent than her in practically every Math lesson. She pats my head like I'm some sort of dog. The usual stuff. But now it's getting annoying and I don't want to be her friend anymore, and no one else wants to be her friend. It's basically pity why some of her other friends are still with her. I feel sorry for this one girl who's gone on a trip with her until next Friday. She's going to have it bad.

You see when we went to America (my friends and I) she was horrible to us the entire time. She would snap at us, tell the teachers we were avoiding her... when we did nothing. This one came around because we refused to go in a room with her the night previous because we were nice and comfy and ready for bed, so we said we didn't want to go. She sent her mother out to spy on us when we were in bed, you know like listen in to our conversation. Then, the next morning, she came in in a foul mood and was being extra horrible to us. Then when we were trying to talk to her she would walk away. Can someone enlighten me on how that's avoiding her?

But anyway, I guess there's nothing much I can do about her. Its just the way it is I guess.

Quote of the day

Okay, so the book I'm currently reading, is more multi-purpose than actually choosing the book out of choice. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted to read this book anyway, but Book Club and school coursework called on me to read this book :D I'm loving it so far, even though I'm like only 110-odd pages in...

"Papa's eyes started corroding. It did not stop Hans Junior. For some reason he looked at the girl. With her three books standing upright on the table, as if in conversation, Liesel was silently mouthing the words as she read from one of them." (Page 111)

As you can guess this book is 'The Book Thief' by Markus Zusak.

I do not own this book, just posting about it....

I've decided what I may do with my blog

I'm thinking of possibly changing the way I blog, like posting stuff like quote of the day from the book I'm currently reading, picking a topic to share my views on, so that maybe not everything won't be the same thing over and over again.

I did have other idea too, but I seem to have forgotten them, maybe they'll come back to me later. But for now I'm going because I have math work to be getting on with, I might be back later to post something else.

Don't you just hate....

Days where you can't sleep. I do. I never seem to be able to sleep at the moment. So I'm back on my iPod in vain attempt to get to sleep. Which is probably why the writing sucks again, though I am taking more of a precaution as I type. How sad Is that? I actually have to look at what buttons I'm pressing whilst I'm typing. Oh well, life's not perfect. I'm going to attempt to go to sleep, if I can't I'll probably be back, so....,

Finally Posting From The Computer

Hopefully there's a difference in the writing now, because I know what I'm typing now...if you know what I mean. Anyway, I'm currently in middle of doing Welsh Homework. The joys. It was supposed to be in last Thursday, but I've managed to avoid her so far, and I know I won't be able to on Monday, so I thought it's better to do it and get it over with, it's not much to write anyway. I don't have to deal with her ranting in the end!

Anyway, not much else to talk about, I'm still feeling ill, but it's getting to the point of annoyance now more than anything, I figure if I don't bother it it'll go away eventually, you feeling me?

So I'm not going to rant much today! Awaiting the applause. Potentially the first blog I've ever done without ranting, I'm hoping this isn't counted as ranting anyway. I view it as venting :D

There were so many spelling mistakes

In my last post that it's unbelievable. I think it would be good to point out that everything is typed out on my iPod, so.....
It's on autocorrect too.....

School

Don't you just thno school can be so troublesome, parsen the Naruto reference. I just don't understand how one group of teachers can set you so much homework, it's unbelievable.

So over the weekend I'm going to see it girlfriend, Catrin, whom I care for so deeply, we've been going out four months tomorrow. And I can't wait to see her.

But yeah, getting back to school, it hasn't been any lighter in homework recently, that's all I've seek to have done is homework, homework, homework, and to be honest wohj you it does get quite annoying.

It's just the joys of AS levels I guess.

Still ill

Even though I thought going to school might help me in my case known to man as a chronic tension headache, I was wrong. It's only seemed to have gotten worse than before and trust me it was bad in the beginning. So my mum is planning on taking me back to the doctors for a second opinion. She just said 'when I have the time' but I'm running out of ibruprofen so I hues it has to be pretty soon, right? But back to school. I really don't see the point only turning up today, we did like nothing. I had double maths first thing, then two frees then double bac, and guess what? We did nothing in either of those lessons, joyous ocasions, right?

But yeah, off the ranting, I just want to get better and friend problems at school aren't making anyjing easier.

I hate headaches

One thing I personally hate at the moment is headaches. I've now had this headache for maybe about a month and it's still not letting up at all. I've been to the doctor and he's said that he can't do much for me, but I'm practicaly crying I'm in so much pain with it, I don't think that's normal. He told me it was common and to not worry about it. I'm trying not to, but I'm sick of having the headache.

Sorry this probably doesn't make sense, I'm typing on my iPod and it doesn't usually type what I want it too.